Diary to Jackson part 2- how I end up in NOLA

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This is the life i spent as a human, also explains how and why i ended up back in New Orleans

As I sat at the airport with my friend Simon beside me he squeezes my hand and winks “rest your head on my shoulder luv, you have a couple of hours before your flight”. Knowing he is right I do as he suggested, I have two hours left with him before I fly out to New Orleans, my brother Jackson and I have been corresponding for over a year while he waits on me to finish my final year at Uni. He requested I come back to New Orleans and take up my place in the family business, trust me after the last two years I am not sure if I want to go back into the business but my nature demands I do….. Closing my eyes and resting I inhale the scent lingering around Simon and begin to fall into the past allowing my mind to process the last year and the real reason for me to return to Jackson in New Orleans.

Arriving at Uni on time has always been a problem, I could blame it on my brother for keeping me up until 3am talking on skype or playing on the game station together with Jackson and Matthew but I can’t, I am just not a morning person. At the beginning of this final year in Uni I was paired with a guy called Simon to work on a collection of clothing using all we have learned so far. We have been a perfect pair and helped each other out socially as well as professionally, if it wasn’t for him, I would never had fallen into modelling. Thanks to his part time work as a photographer’s assistant we have managed to create a professional portfolio for the first half of our work. We date for a while but preferred to be the ‘beautiful couple’ the bitches have dubbed us. Anyway seeing as we were making a mixture of clothing he wanted me to model however we had a little issue, the clothing we were making were designed for the men and woman who live an alternative life style who love to show off the clothing AND the body art they cherish. I had only gotten one tattoo in my life and that was in a private place in honour of my parents once I had hit eighteen. So over the year I designed tattoos, had myself inked until I was the vision he saw to model the clothes. Once word had gotten around I was modelling these clothes AND had a certain look more students from the alternative world emailed us asking to join, soon after that social media took off and we found ourselves business partners.

I had been at Uni for six months when it all started, the latest tattoo was irritating me but that wasn’t anything new, after rubbing in the lotion I dressed in our latest outfit and drove to Uni. While at a set of traffic lights I felt a tingle in my hands, my feet felt heavy and itchy, eyes seemed to change between seeing in colour then black and white. Shaking my head, I hear a honking sound and notice the lights had changed from Red to Green, feeling like an idiot I manage to battle my body and drive to Uni, park the car and sit for few minutes monitoring my breathing. Once I was calm and my body cooperated, I managed to walk into the factory (it’s what Simon and I called the textiles lab) and pull out the utensils needed for the swimsuit we were designing. ‘how many more times are you going to put us through this pain little wolf?’ looking around my table I try to see who it was talking, I swore I was alone so to hear this strange purring voice asking someone a question was a little unnerving. Simon was not due to be in today, so I was thinking about locking the door to the lab when prickling sensation passed over my neck and a loud snapping sound echoed. “what the hell?” spinning my body around I call out asking if anyone is there, “stupid cow Rosie, you know what happens in the movies” closing my eyes, inhaling then exhaling I focus on the task at hand. I have to  cut out the pattern then cut out the material ready for Simon to spend hours at the sewing machine and over locker putting the material together. Laughter flows into the room from the students walking past, during pinning the material together I prick myself with a pin and hear the far off sound of a snarling ‘watch yourself little wolf, your dna is special’  “fuck off and leave me alone” there was no reason for me to snarl my reply yet I do anyway. Hearing the laughter my skin is dotted with goose bumps  while my head feels like a hand is stroking my hair “ok that’s it I can’t do this”. Sending Simon a text message I leave the work out ready for him to take over and get the hell out of dodge

Over the course of six months that voice was not the only one I could hear; I heard a female voice that felt loving and warm yet cold and dangerous at the same time. While I would be alone at a café, pub or even in class listening to the professor I would see ghosts of battles from the past ( I know this because of the clothing) I would see wolf packs fighting one another, at one time I was sent to the sanatorium because jumped out of my seat and yelled at the professor to watch out and threw a pair of scissors in her direction for them to land in the wall. The professor had noticed changes within me so didn’t report it to the police but did suggest (after a conference with the dean) that I take a hard-long look at my life and come off the drugs. I do not do drugs!

Not only was I no longer sleeping, I found food and liquid revolting, socialising became impossible and my relationship with Matthew and Jackson was that strained I was shocked to find Matthew in the kitchen making me some breakfast and tea. Words were not exchanged because he only appeared when I was in trouble or  well if I am in trouble so like a good little girl I sat my ass down on the kitchen chair waiting for my ass to be handed to me. Instead, he walked over to me, placed the camomile tea in front of me.  A loving smile plastered across my face when I notice he has actually made camomile tea using REAL camomile from the herb garden AND made it in my mothers traditional English bone china tea cup. Drawing in a long breath my eyes close and I release the breath before taking a sip of tea, look up at him, take another sip of tea then tell him how I am flunking in school, all about the voices and ghostly images I am seeing. It was then he takes a seat and asks if I can tell him more about the wolves. Looking at him as if I have just told him I am running away with a biker gang to be their baby mama I take my tea and walk into the living room, placing the cup on the table carefully then yell at him, “WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY ‘WHAT DO THE WOLVES LOOK LIKE?’” as calm as ever he pushes me onto the sofa then explain it is nearly a year and I need to get home for Jackson to explain BUT in order for him to explain he needs to know about the wolves, for some reason I just cry and cry and tell him to leave because I have to book myself into a psych ward. He laughs at me telling me to get my ass to New Orleans where my brother will tell me everything but…… the wolves are real. Thank god I didn’t tell him I woke up the other night to find a wolf tail between my legs.


So here I am after a long video chat with Jackson waiting to board my flight to New Orleans. Simon is meant to follow me later in the year where he is going to run the fashion empire we are going to create, first he has to finish school because, “one of us needs the credentials seeing as you are a Uni drop out young lady”.

“Flight BA527X90 to New Orleans via New York boarding now, please come to gate 6”

Crying in his arms I kiss is cheek and nod at him before I leave and head back to the Big Easy where I feel everything will be all but Easy from here on out.